


Dancing On My Own

by TheCircusIsInTown



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 4th Year, F/M, M/M, Unrequited Love, Yule Ball
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-02
Updated: 2013-11-02
Packaged: 2017-12-31 06:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1028401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCircusIsInTown/pseuds/TheCircusIsInTown
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From that moment in first year Draco knew he was stuck. They most definitely weren't destined to be friends, but how cliché that a no-good Slytherin should become infatuated with The-Boy-Who-Lived.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dancing On My Own

**Author's Note:**

> Inspiration came from hearing the Kings of Leon cover of 'Dancing On My Own'. The story makes much more sense if you play the song, but can be read without. 
> 
> Reviews and kudos are welcome.
> 
> 6/3/16 - minor updates for a hopefully smoother read.

From that moment in first year Draco knew he was stuck. They most definitely weren't destined to be friends, but how cliché that a no-good Slytherin should become infatuated with The-Boy-Who-Lived. Now Draco breathed for those split seconds the two locked eyes. One vibrant green pair filled with hatred, another cool grey, hard and emotionless. Draco's father had taught him that emotions were weak from a young age; the last thing he wanted was those malachite green eyes to see the masked pain coursing through Draco every time Harry met him with another insult or glare. Obviously Draco was no martyr, his only way of communication with Harry was to antagonize him and Merlin he loathed it. Every sharp remark returned; every spark of hate in those eyes; every muffled snigger after the Weasel muttered something made Draco feel worse, helpless; but at the same time having that face fixated upon him gave him a rush no drug could ever create.

Whilst Pansy was dancing with Nott, Draco took another gulp of the punch, and thank fucking Merlin some genius had spiked it, _how was he meant to get through this sober?_ Draco cast another surreptitious glance at Harry. He was swaying to the soft pulse of the music with Cho Chang, some Ravenclaw, who couldn't even give the courtesy to look at him whilst dancing. Instead, her gaze was fixed on Diggory, laughing with a Beauxbaton girl on the other side of the room.

_Does she love you better than I can? I'm the one who’s paying attention. I'm right over here, why can't you see me? I’m the one in fucking love with you!_

A group of students obscured his view of Harry as he made his way back to the floor, somewhat tipsily. Both he and the group were tiptoeing around the broken bottles and stilettos littered about the stone floor, the aftermath of the earlier, more upbeat festivities. Draco dreamed of striding over to Harry, grabbing his hands, rough from Quidditch, and pulling him into an embrace, but life didn't work like that. With any luck Draco would be stunned fast enough to miss the look of disgust in the other boy's eyes. _Why can't you be mine?_

He understood why so many still danced. With all the stress of the tournament looming over the school _not to mention the stress and pain of yearning after The Golden Boy,_ everyone needed a night to relax, to be free. To Draco, that’s what dancing was; freedom.  _I sound like a fag, through and through._ With every spin Draco’s stress was driven further back. The dancing let almost everything else disappear, leaving Draco practically alone with his thoughts. _I’m just gonna dance all night._

Instead he resumed dancing with Pansy, in a different corner of the floor. In a Brief glance he saw potter try to kiss Chang, but she was too preoccupied with Diggory to notice. _I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her._ Dancing with Pansy was fine, although her movements were precise, not unlike Draco's, after years of dance lessons, for occasions like this. With Harry Draco imagined uncoordinated, unanticipated moves, which would be very welcome, as that beaming smile of Potter's was able to warm the insides of Draco's hopeless heart. In a way, dancing with Pansy was like dancing alone. _I keep dancing on my own._

At this point Draco was far too drunk to think straight, _and since when have I ever thought 'straight' anyway?_ His thoughts were spinning in circles, much like the dancers remaining. There had been a good four years for Draco to evaluate his sexuality, and Potter's, for that matter. In his opinion Draco couldn’t care less who was fucking who, and being friends with Blaise meant you inevitably heard a lot about _that_ side of Hogwarts.

Potter on the other hand, Draco wasn't sure about. Publicly, Potter got quite a few female advances, due to his celebrity status _and excellent looks_ , but had remained single throughout his time in school; the previous attempt on Cho also verified this attraction. That being said Draco was adamant he had seen the boy gawking at some of the Drumstrang boys, whilst they were down by the lake exercising. _But why should his preferences matter to me? Not like it'll get me anywhere. My luck he's probably straight as a wand._ Draco stole another look at Harry, who was still dancing, although seemed to be lagging. _Why can't I be the girl you're taking home?_

_Is this what I’ve stooped to? Longing after someone who wouldn’t think twice about cursing me?_

Although the dancers were drunken and drowsy, they were still dancing well. They all were dancing in separate pairs, but the small twirls and turns made up one big mass of spinning colours, glinting in the ice sculpted chandeliers. At this point, Pansy and Draco were dancing quite closely to the pair. _So far away, but still so near._ With the melodies slowing down, Pansy had her head rested on the crook of Draco's neck, to other couples this was romantic, but for the two it was just a platonic gesture of their friendship. This meant Draco's eyes were free to roam about the room, and in doing so, he fleetingly caught Harry's eyes, before they returned to Cho, who was finally paying attention.

He watched as Harry slowly dipped his head, capturing her painted lips in a kiss. She didn't respond that eagerly, but politely ended the kiss and excused herself. In the moment Harry leaned in, Draco's heart shattered. _Who knew love hurt so much?_ He thought bitterly. Unable to watch the scene, Draco gently let go of Pansy and ran out of the hall, praying the threatening tears would wait until he was clear of Potter. He made it to the doors. _I’m so fucking stupid._

Harry stared dumbfound as Malfoy ran out of the Great Hall. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, apart from the pitiful looks he caught in Parkinson and Zabini's eyes.

 _Fuck this is so stupid. I’m so stupid._ Harry thought, as he made his way out of the hall in Draco’s wake.


End file.
